The edge of a cliff
After celebrating Mother’s Day over the weekend, I am always reminded of when a certain story hit me hard as a mom. It made me hold my little ones a bit tighter and cherish the moments of their life. Especially during the hard days of motherhood when I felt like pulling my hair out. I asked the person behind this to share a little about her story with our readers. She has done amazing things and has taught me and so many others life lessons. Meet Molly Jackson…
I was on the phone with my sister not long after my daughter died. Yes, you did read that right. My daughter died. My sister said something that has never left me.
“From the moment my son was born, I felt like I was walking on the edge of a cliff.” And that’s when we broke down and sobbed together for the 100th time since Lucy’s accident and it was confirmed yet again–I had fallen off of that proverbial cliff. Hard.
From the second she began choking on that small bit of apple, until the horrific moment of giving her body away to the organ donation team 4 days later, I was falling. Falling, falling, falling in a slow-motion horror film into the deepest depths known to mankind. It was a dark abyss from which I never thought I’d live to see the light of day again.
Yet here I sit, 5 years later. It was this week on a beautiful Spring day in May that I was unexpectedly shoved off the cliff of Motherhood. Nothing could have prepared me for it. There were no danger signs, or “beware of falling rocks”. My perfect, beautiful, curly blonde-haired daughter alive and well one moment, then rushed in my husband’s arms to the fire station next door for help after the Heimlich maneuver failed to work. Here. Gone.
But we all know it can happen. Each morning that we wake we once again walk the edge of that cliff. Balancing our children, our responsibilities, hoping beyond hope that no one plummets downward.
So how did I make it back to top of the cliff? How do you stay from falling off? Well, I can’t promise you that tragedy won’t strike. I can’t promise perfect health, wealth and happiness. But I can share from my experience a few things that kept me from wallowing far below the sunlight where I could have easily shriveled and died.
1) You are stronger than you know.
2) Things have a way of getting better. But you have to hold on.
3) Let others in. They want to help. Vulnerability connects and strengthens us all.
4) Let tragedy and trials transform you. Don’t fight the teaching contained within them.
There is no going back once you become a mother. And maybe you’ve been one of the lucky ones who hasn’t fallen off the cliff. Or maybe you have fallen, but not very far. We all stumble, there is no doubt about that. And sometimes our children make us feel like we are teetering on the cliffs of insanity. But there are times when the path widens and we feel safer. Maybe we even find a luxurious meadow we can sit and rest a while. There are incredible rewards after walking that treacherous cliff for days on end when our children laugh together and hug us and tell us we are the best mother in the world. And those moments are worth it all.
So hang on. Don’t give up. These cliffs of motherhood have the power to transform you in ways nothing else on earth can. And one day, you will reach the end of your path and you will look back and see just how far you have come. From the deepest valleys, to the highest peaks, the expansiveness of eternity will astound you.
After all, isn’t that what we see every time we look into the faces of our children?
*If you’d like to read more about Molly’s journey please visit her blog at www.hopesmilingbrightly.com
XOXO
Comments & Replies
Leave a comment
This really is inspiring. I gave all my kids a little extra love after reading this!
I was so touched by watching and reading about her story on her blog. What an amazing reminder to us to not take a day for granted and for our sisters who have been through this pain to know that they can continue each day. Amazing story. Thank you for sharing.
That Molly sure is amazing! I’ve been a big fan of hers since I heard about her sweet Lucy’s passing. I just love hearing her powerful words.
I can’t even imagine. She reminds me a lot of my best friend who lost her boy to SIDS. Losing a child has to be the hardest trial ever. People like this that find lessons and strength in their trials amaze me.
Sweet sweet words. What an incredible woman.